Hollywood Gay Mafia 'Ironed Actor's Curtains Against His Will'

Hollywood's notorious Gay Mafia claimed another victim yesterday when a young actor had his apartment tidied against his will.

Jake Rogan, who does not wish to be named for fear of reprisals, said a number of slim, willowy men burst into his residence and forced him to watch as they ruthlessly cleaned it.

Visibly shaken, Rogan, 24, who has had bit parts in several soap operas, said last night, 'It was horrible, horrible. First they picked up all the empty pizza boxes. Then they hoovered everywhere - I mean, they moved the furniture and everything. Finally they took down the curtains and washed and ironed them. You read about this sort of thing but you don't think it'll happen to you.'

The attack appears to have been a punishment for Rogan's refusal to pay protection money to the Gay Mafia that many say effectively rules the entertainment capital of the world. His ordeal began two weeks ago when a waspish young man wielding a nail-file walked into the apartment uninvited. "He said, 'What a ghastly place you have here. It would be a shame if someone came and tidied it up.'"

Speaking from his now spotless apartment, Rogan said, "This used to be a respectable bachelor pad. Now look at it. It'll take months to put right."

Hogan fought back a manly tear as he described how the thugs wantonly recycled his prized used beer-can collection.

The gang also:

* POLISHED a coffee table
* THREW BLEACH down his toilet and
* CLEANED his oven

"They were remorseless," said Rogan. "They really enjoyed their work. They were singing songs from Mary Poppins while they dusted. I think they like tidying."

The thugs held Rogan down while his home was violated. When he tried to resist, he was horribly wounded by a bitchy remark about his personal appearance.

"They said, 'Who does your hair, Helen Keller?'" he recalled.

Before leaving the mafiosi warned him that next time they would redecorate in pastels and put up a spice-rack in his kitchen. When he said he would go to the police, they threatened to 'get him'.

"Well, what they actually said was, 'Ooh, get you,'" he admitted.

Police say they have no leads as to the identity of the raiders. They wore rubber gloves so as not to leave fingerprints and to avoid getting their hands dirty.

This is not the first time the Gay Mafia have been accused of involvement in housework attacks on vulnerable heterosexual bachelors. They have also been linked to clothes-laundering. Take the chilling story of session musician Dave Kaminsky, 35. Two months ago he awoke to find a clothes-horse in his bed. He ignored the warning, and two days later came home to find all his clothes washed and pressed. His underpants had been folded and put away neatly in a drawer, arranged by color.

The leadership of the Hollywood Gay Mafia is thought to include some of the most powerful men in the entertainment industry and no-one is immune from their reach. Last month a Grand Jury was empanelled to investigate allegations that David Geffen personally ordered that Bruce Willis's dog be shampooed after Willis refused to sign a five year contract with Dreamworks.


March 02