I no longer have distribution for this. Disregard most of the below. If the world ever gets back to something like normal e-mail me and I can sell you a copy direct.


My newest and best book is out!

It is called 'Clara and Miles Act Up'.

This is the cover:

It is a B-format paperback and has 512 pages, and very good pages they are too.

It is available to order online right this minute.

You can get it direct from the website of my distributors:

Buy at YPD Books website

Or via their Amazon UK shop:

Buy at York Publishing Amazon shop

(I and they and of course the British taxman get slightly more money the first way, but it may be slightly more convenient to you the second way.)

The cover price is 10. But the price is reduced to 6 in both the above shops to allow for postage. With P&P it will come to almost 9 if you're in Britain and a bit more if you're foreign, but that's your fault really.

The ISBN is 978-0-9554602-1-0.

The Nielsen Book Data listing has now gone through and those in the book trade (or indeed with any kind of shop, or stall, or street-barrow) can order it direct from my distributors York Publishing Services.

That is all. There may be an interesting further announcement soon. Or not.


Certain flaws have already come to light in this first edition. I have decided not to recall it or offer a refund as they will eventually make it more valuable.

p24 'patrolling the woods near Berchtesgarden'

BerchtesGADEN! BerchtesGADEN! BerchtesGADEN!

Please take a pen and knock out the r.


There is a 'where' that should be a 'were', please cross out the h.

p266 'Take care of yourself, etc'

Turns out to be pretty much a line from a popular 1970s sci-fi film called 'Space Wars' or something, which I have probably watched at some point. As far as I recall this wasn't deliberate so cross it out and substitute something less similar.

(Oh, and to be on the safe side, I have a vague feeling that the bit about 'trifles with a cherry on top' on p103 may have been remembered from somewhere, but I'm buggered if I can find where and was buggered if I was cutting it without knowing for sure. The problem with these things is that, as others have noted, sometimes when you come up with something good it can feel like you're remembering it. So, e.g., after I wrote the original Haarburste stories I spent an hour extensively netsearching 'Orbison clingfilm' in case it had already been done.)


By the way for those who've read it, I note with amusement that the 'Which is scarier?' bit on page 124 has just (end of Jan 2016) almost come true in a cartoon in the Sunday Times, in this case the cartoonist apparently being unable to decide whether or not being poisoned with polonium by Putin is scarier.



I'm told the book is showing up listed on US Amazon costing hundreds of dollars. I don't have a clue what that's about. It is easily worth it, and will doubtless be sold at auction for thousands in the fullness of time, but you probably shouldn't pay that much for it now. If you go to the direct link above, you can buy from the British Amazon shop even if you live in America or anywhere else outside the Blessed Isles. Just use your normal US or wherever Amazon log-in. (I assume this is true, anyway, the reverse always works for me). Or, of course, just order from my distributors' own online shop, which seems to be quite safe and straightforward.

Pilot script for a radio sitcom version of Clara and Miles, which draws on a couple of early chapters and incorporates new material